I sit here alone on New Year's Day 2012, staring at a blank piece of paper. But what does that mean? What does that represent? Is it somehow a reflection of what I feel like? So I began to fill the blank page with random thoughts...finding as many questions as answers, seeking to articulate the uncertainty of another new year, and the certainty of an unchanging Lord.
Emptiness. I have nothing. I recognize anew that the Source is found somewhere other than within me. Yet if I'm honest, much of 2011 was spent scavenging on some leftover morsel of hope and direction I had tucked away for a rainy day. Don't we all do that? A song that ministers to us, a message that moves us, even a passage of Scripture that became a lifeline in a moment of desperation. All these and so many more are tools God uses to speak to us, to help us and heal us when we find our ship slamming into the breakers of life. But they were meant by God to minister at that particular point in time...for that crisis. Like the nomadic Israelites wandering in the wilderness, our nature is to stockpile the manna of God's goodness - to trust in my ability to take what God has given me and distribute it into my life as the need arises, meanwhile ignoring the provision of God. The result is at best a stale version of what He intended, while the fresh Bread of Life goes ignored. Emptiness acknowledges my inability.
Hunger. I need something. Why is it so hard to admit our hunger? We have created a spiritual facade in American Christianity where everything's good...hands in the air and a smile on our face...but most of what we're peddling won't sustain us to the parking lot. Our people are hungry, but not for professionally-packaged fluff. What few times I've fasted, something unforeseen happened. As hours turned into days, the gnawing of my stomach subsided. I thought at first I'd never make it, but sticking to a fast gets easier the farther into it you get. Unfortunately, it's the same way with God's Fresh Presence. The longer we go without feeding on Him, the less of an appetite we have. While we grow weaker, we also grow complacent. Lethargic. Dead. Paralyzed. Hunger is a sign of life. Craving God's Fresh Presence motivates. Longing for more than spiritual junk food will compel us to action. Like the four starving lepers in 2 Kings 7, someone needs to speak the truth today: "Why are we sitting here until we die?"
Anticipation. God has everything. There is an Answer available. But we won't find it in books, at conferences, or last year's sermons. Our friends don't hold it. Mentors can't deliver it. Pastors can't provide it. The God of all goodness...The King of New Beginnings...The Creator and Sustainer of 2012 says clearly, "Come unto Me...Call unto Me...Cry out to Me." Anticipation is hope. Anticipation is confidence. It is contagious. It is refreshing and satisfying.
He holds 2012. He also holds me. My purpose, my peace, my opportunities of being used in Kingdom work are found in Him alone.
Bring on 2012. He's got it covered.
So much for a blank piece of paper...
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